What Is Anal Sex?

During anal sex, a penis or a sex toy — such as a dildo, vibrator, or butt plug — penetrates the anus. Many people engage in anal sex regardless of their sexual orientation.

Anal sex can be enjoyable and safe when you take the proper precautions such as practicing ahead of time, using lubrication, using a condom (especially with new partners), and communicating with your partner before and during any intimacy.

Safety

The anus is a sensitive area, and some people may be more sensitive than others. If you experience pain during anal sex, stop and tell your partner.

For those who are new to being the receiver, anal sex can be painful the first time if you haven't practiced or used lubrication. Using a butt plug can help you prepare for having anal sex with a partner. 

Pain can also come from irritations and injuries. Anal sex can irritate any hemorrhoids you may have. Hemorrhoids which are swollen veins in your anus or rectum, aren’t always obvious since they can occur in the rectum as well as externally. Less common, and more serious, are anal sphincter injuries and a tear in the anus or rectum that gets larger (called a fistula).

You can reduce the possibility of pain by planning and practicing solo ahead of time, communicating with your partner as you go, and using lots of lube.

Considerations

Before you get started, it’s important that you prep to get your rectum ready to have something inserted – especially if it's your first time having anal sex. Proper preparation is key to having a safe and pleasurable experience.

Plan Ahead to Avoid Tears

Lee Phillips, LCSW, CST, EdD, psychotherapist and certified sex and couples therapist recommends that those new to anal sex start slow and experiment by themselves first. “People may be curious about [anal sex], and then they go down there, and they look at it, and they go, ‘I don't know about this,’" Phillips told Health.

After you've done that initial exploration session and decide you want to do more, try using your fingers or a sex toy to explore penetration. Because the sphincter muscle is very sensitive, Phillips cautions against finger play if you have long fingernails.

Butt plugs, which come in silicone, glass, and metal, are toys made to go in the anus for sexual pleasure. Since they come in different sizes, they can also be used to get your anus ready for something larger, like a bigger toy or a penis. Phillips recommends glass toys because they’re slick, comfortable, and allows for sexual stimulation through heat and cold. If you're a first-timer, try starting with the smaller size and working your way up.

Unlike the vagina, the anus doesn't self-lubricate, so you'll need to use lube in order to avoid tearing from friction. Although more studies are needed, lubricants can play a role in improved sexual health and well-being.

The type of lube you choose depends on your preferences and the toys you plan to use. Water-based lube is okay for use with toys, fingers, or a penis, but it's not long-lasting – so you'll want to keep the bottle handy.

Silicone lube has longer-lasting power, but you don't want to use it with a silicone toy, according to Phillips. Silicone lube can deteriorate sex toys that are made of silicone, due to how silicone molecules react with each other. Silicone is also safe to use with latex condoms.

Oil-based lube will weaken latex, so avoid using it with condoms.

Maintaining Hygiene and Avoiding Accidents

If you're concerned about poop, there are some ways to prep that help avoid accidents. But, keep in mind, accidents can happen, so you'll want to have a clean-up plan just in case.

"Cleaning before helps reduce the possibility of an accident," said Phillips. Eating light meals the day of anal sex and pooping ahead of time can also help avoid any fecal-related incidents.

Using a douche can help you clean out your rectum before anal sex. Douching involves cleaning internally with water through a nozzle or tube inserted into the anus.

The possibility of poop showing up is part of having anal sex, so if it happens, know that it's natural. You and your partner may choose to stop and shower, use baby wipes, or you may keep going and clean up afterwards, depending on what you're both comfortable with.

Taking a clean-up break is especially important if you want to have vaginal sex after anal. The vagina and anus have different bacteria, and introducing bacteria from the anus to the vagina can cause a variety of infections, including yeast infections or urinary tract infections (UTIs).

Communication and Consent

It's important to discuss your expectations, desires, and concerns before having anal sex for the first time or getting intimate with a new partner. This is when you'll talk about consent and come to an understanding of what each partner wants from the experience.

Phillips recommends talking about things that make you feel excited and things that also make you feel anxious about anal sex. "A lot of people get anxious, and when you get anxious, the sphincter muscle tightens up more," said Phillips.

Making sure you're on the same page ahead of time can help to reduce anxiety and make the experience better for both of you.

Here are some topics to cover with your partner:

• Why you want to try anal sex
• What you like or might like about it
• What you might dislike or feel uncomfortable with
• What you and your partner hope to get out of the experience
• How you will communicate if someone wants to stop, or something feels uncomfortable
• If you will use toys or if penetration will happen with a penis
• How you'll handle a poop accident (Does that put an end to sexual activity, or do you clean up and resume?)
  
  

So much of enjoying any type of intercourse or sexual activity comes down to communication. You and your partner want to be on the same page. Even if you've carefully planned the big event, check in with your partner during the act. Tell them what feels good and what doesn't or if you need to make an adjustment or stop.

It can take some time to figure out what works for both of you, especially if you're trying anal for the first time. Try not to get discouraged if things don't happen the way you want right away. It's another opportunity to talk with your partner and try different approaches for next time.

Risks

Anal sex carries the highest risk of getting or transmitting HIV because the anus is sensitive and can get cuts and tears more easily. Using a condom, along with lube to prevent tears, can help protect you from getting exposed to an STI or STD.

The infections you can get through anal sex can occur in the rectum or in the penis of the person doing the penetrating. These include:

• Syphilis
• Hepatitis B
• Chlamydia
• Gonorrhea
• Human papillomavirus (HPV)
• Herpes
• HIV

Some STDs — namely HIV, chlamydia, and gonorrhea — are spread through bodily fluids, like semen. Others like HIV and hepatitis B come from the blood of someone with the condition. Other STDs such as genital herpes, syphilis, and human papillomavirus (HPV) are most often spread through genital skin-to-skin contact.

There are also other precautions you can take. You can reduce your risk of getting hepatitis A and B, and HPV by getting vaccinated. Pre-exposure prophylaxis or PrEP is a prescription medication that reduces your risk of getting HIV from sex by around 99%.

A Quick Review

Trying anal sex for the first time can be an exciting way for you and your partner to experience a new sensation together.

The keys to anal sex for beginners are communication, exploring and practicing with toys ahead of time, using protection, and lots of lube. Consent is a must for a good and safe experience.

Like vaginal sex, you can get STIs by practicing anal sex, so use protection and ask a health provider about your options when it comes to preventing STIs.